Post Offices

The following is reprinted word-for-word (with permission) from www.girlalive.com. Thanks to Alana for loaning me content (and server storage space for some of my files).

If you’re American, you have a certain idea of what a post office does. It is a place you go to mail things. When I go to the USPS web site, I’m greeted with headings like “plan a shipment”, “find a zip code”. Under “products and services” there are headings like, “mailing & shipping”, “postage & options” and “receiving mail”. They do a few other things, like selective service registration and passport renewal. But getting letters and packages from one place to another is the main thing. When you go there, there are things for sale, like stamps and packing supplies, and sometimes they get fancy and sell postcards.

By contrast, if you go to the British Post Office web site, the heading of the page is, “Savings, Life Insurance, Foreign Currency”. The headings on that page are “Money & Insurance”, “Broadband & Phone”, “Travel”, and then as almost an afterthought, “Letters and Parcels”. The post office does everything. If you want foreign currency, go to the post office. If you want insurance, go to the post office. If you want to pay your gas bill or top up your mobile phone, go to the post office. And on top of all that, they sell all manner of crap there. There are the usual post office things like packing supplies, but there are also greeting cards, wrapping paper, toys, knitting and sewing supplies, costume jewelry, handbags, and calendars.

On the surface, you might be thinking, “That’s great, being able to do all those things in one place.” But keep in mind that you have to stand in line with everyone who is doing any of those things. I’ve had to go to the post office two days in a row and the line stretches out the door every time you go there. Yesterday I was in line between a man who was paying his gas bill and buying socks, and a woman who was collecting her pension payment and shopping for birthday cards. I was the only one there who was actually mailing something.

I have really come to hate and dread the post office here, because I know from living in America that going to the post office doesn’t have to be that horrible. It can be a clean and efficient process involving sending and recieving of packages only. I think I miss American post offices almost as much as I miss American peanut butter.


Originally posted 31 Dec 2008 at girlalive.com.

Is that the 12th of January or the 1st of December?

In the UK (and most of the world) dates are written DD/MM/YYYY. That is, day, then month, then year. The US is one of the only places I know of in the world that writes dates as MM/DD/YYYY. As a logical person, I can only give this point to the British.

When you're talking about a date, the date is the most specific part, then the month is slightly less specific, and then the year is the least specific of all. So to my mind (and the minds of most of the world) that's the logical way to present the date. Alternatively, YYYY/MM/DD is a good way, when you're talking about things like computer file names. Then when they're sorted they all end up in a proper order. But there is no situation in which putting the month first logically makes sense.

If you're American, and you just have to put the month first, please spell it out so the rest of the world understands you. If you tell me that your birthday is 12/01/1960, you'll be getting your card in January.

Aluminum or Aluminium?

Atomic number 13, symbol Al, Pop cans and car bodies are made of this light metal. Americans spell it aluminum and pronounce it "uh-loom-i-num". The British spell it aluminium and pronounce it "al-yoo-min-ee-um". So who is correct?

Alumin(i)um was discovered by Humphrey Davy in 1808, and he called it "alumium" because of the already known Al salt, alum. In 1812 he changed the name to "aluminum" because I guess he thought it sounded better. At the same time, a group of scientists in Britain changed the spelling to "aluminium" because they thought the "-ium" ending made it sound more like the other elements.

The discoverer himself called it aluminum, and he was born in Britain. Those who decided it needed to sound more like the other elements and changed the name from underneath him were rude and presumptuous. By their logic, my wedding ring should be made of goldium and my good flatware made of silverium.

Based on the simple rule that the discoverer or inventor of something has the naming rights and in honor of Humphrey Davy, this point goes to the Americans. The foil covering your leftover meatloaf is aluminum foil, not aluminium foil.

What is sherbet?

In the US, sherbet is basically sorbet. It is fruit juice and (sometimes) egg whites frozen together into a dessert that is creamy in texture, but usually tart in flavor, and contains no dairy products. Sometimes orange sherbet is served with vanilla ice cream. It can be floated in punch to cool and flavor it.

In the UK, sherbet is powdered fruit drink mix, or the powder by itself (for Americans: think Kool Ade or Pixy Stix). The powdered sherbet is available as a candy on its own, or as part of another candy.

So which of these is correct?

Sherbet comes from Turkish sherbet or Persian sharbat. Both of those trace back to an arabic word for "drink" and they all referred to a fruit drink. On the surface, this points to the British meaning being closer to the correct usage. However, the middle eastern drink sherbet was often cooled with snow, or blended with snow like a slushy, which is how it got attached to the frozen fruit dessert in the US.

I'm a little stuck on this one. The British usage of sherbet for a beverage is far older than the American usage. However, in actual practice, sherbet in Britain is more often a fruity flavored powder of tartaric acid and sugar. The American frozen dessert usage pre-dates the powdered drink mix/candy. So both usages for the word sherbet are not quite accurate, but not entirely inaccurate.

On balance, I'm going to have to award this one as a tie. Neither one is more or less correct than the other in a purely historical linguistic sense. It annoys me because I totally wanted to give this one to the Americans.

Who's Got Talent?

Since everyone is currently talking about Susan Boyle and Britain's Got Talent, let's look at some of the differences between that show and its American counterpart, America's Got Talent.

The talent: No discernable differences. Both countries have very talented people and also a lot of people who merely think they're talented. Both countries have people who are desparate to be famous for any reason or no reason.

The judges: In Britain you have Simon Cowell, Amanda Holden and Piers Morgan. In the US, you have David Hasslehoff, Sharon Osborne, and Piers Morgan. The problem I have is with the American judges. Only one of them is American. Why are the British choosing who America will find entertaining? I've seen acts that Hasslehoff and the audience loved, but who didn't get through because Sharon Osborne and Piers Morgan don't understand the American sense of humor. Britain would boycott the show if Britain's Got Talent only had one British judge.

The prize: In Britain, the prize is a contract to do more performances, including a performance at the Royal Variety show, all in total worth something like £100,000. In America, it's a million dollars. The American prize leads to only singers getting through. For every clever and funny act that goes through America, you get a chorus of, "It's nice but is it worth a million dollars?" That prize takes all the variety out of the variety show. It narrows the field of "worthy" competitors so much that it isn't particularly fun to watch, other than for the drunken antics of Hasslehoff. The British prize is much smaller. They get to play for the Queen (or Prince or other royals). This means that the only limit is "Would Her Majesty want to see this?" Because of this, they get a much better variety of acts. A street dance troupe might not be worth a million dollars, but they might just be talented enough for a slot in a show for the Queen.

Basically, after having watched both shows, I prefer Britain's Got Talent. It is more true to the vision of being a variety show, and more true to the vision of being a variety show to represent the country in which it is based. My message for America's Got Talent would be to change the prize, ditch the British judges, and maybe you'll have a chance at a tie. For now, the point here goes to the British.